A Minister Well Cared For

By Stephen McLaughlin

The feelings of helplessness were overwhelming; like the sudden plunge of one’s out-of-control car over guardrails and into dark waters. That was my life in 2013!
I had been married for 22 years. It had been a difficult marriage. There were differences in our values, and level of commitment to ministry and to the Lord. In the beginning these differences seemed almost were almost undetectible, but they grew like the shaking of the ground under the sea becomes a tsunami. Along with these issues, my ex-wife developed severe depression related to childhood abuse.
When her symptoms were severe life, was difficult. I prayed, hoped, and had no intentions of leaving, but nevertheless found myself headed over the guardrails. In 2013, the sudden plunge came. My wife left in an ambulance on May 13th, after making a suicide gesture. While in a psychiatric unit she decided she wanted a divorce. Her decision, subsequently fully implemented, is where circumstances stood when I first spoke to Rev. Hamilton in September of 2013 after I had resigned the Church I’d pastored in May.

Given that we Christians have a long history of “shooting our wounded,” I didn’t know what to expect, but I was not disappointed. I never felt like Paul in 2 Tim 4:16, “on trial alone.” I am so grateful for the compassionate way I was received by Conference Minister Rev. Ron Hamilton, Rev. Lenn Zeller, Director of Conference Care, and the Minister-Under-Care team assigned to me, 3 men whom God will reward.

In the CCCC there are godly people who aren’t afraid to get involved, to throw out the life-line, and pull upward with the help of the Holy Spirit. And pull me upward and out of those dark waters my Minister-Under-Care team did, for about a year and a half.
They didn’t let me suffer alone, they helped me address important areas of need. I was held acountable for counseling, Church attendance, etc. Without the upward pull of the care team, and of course the Holy Spirit, I’m sure I would have drowned. By myself, I had no idea how to come back up from where I had assumed that I would never go.
For many of us in ministry, believing as we do, things like divorce, as in my case, or other issues like patterns of inappropriate behavior and expressions of anger or forced exits from the pulpit can be disasters— crises from which we will recover poorly without help.

My CCCC Minister-Under-Care team, and the conference leadership stood with me as I latched on to the life-line they provided and came out of the dark waters. I commend to you the Minister-Under-Care process, the Conference Care people, and the Holy Spirit who heals. CCCC ministers, my hope and prayer is that you will not run, shrink, or wither away in a time of great trouble should it come to you, but instead that you will reach for help, as help reaches to you from the Conference and from the Lord.

“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 ESV